Saturday, November 26, 2005


I couldn't return to the Hermitage without visiting the Bath House. I remember soaking here for...was it days?...enjoying the deep relaxation, aromatherapy, and food. I lost all track of time and lived only by my senses, weightless.

Today I'm in search of that weightless feeling again and the reawakening of my deadened senses. I need relief from the heavy burdens of grief, loss, confusion, sorrow, . . . and on and on the emotions pile up on my slumped shoulders. So I am diving into the blessed, warm waters to seek their comfort.

At first I feel as if I am in a mud bath. My body moves so slowly with little range of motion, its burdens too heavy to allow much movement. But soon, the warm water oils my stiff joints and the many watery hands bouy me up. One-by-one I sense the removal of the heavy packages from my shoulders. My body and soul are lightened and my spirits rise.

Just as I imagine a new born fish would react, I move around in the bath slowly, reaquainting myself with this weightless feeling that I haven't felt in ages. I take comfort from being held and caressed by watery hands all about me. As I gain trust and flexibility, I begin moving around more quickly, flicking my tail, and immerse myself in the waters as I would in the arms of an old friend. We splash and dance and play in the weightlessness.

Ah! That's the feeling I came here to kinship with water and the joy it brings. It returns my youth and my innocence taking me away from all space and time allowing me to just be. This is the feeling I need to soak in for a while to reset remind my body, mind, and soul how this feels...and how I want to live.